How to get a teen to leave the room : )

My days are so busy and filled with work, home and my two kids. I often time have very little time to spend with my husband before I go to bed exhausted.

Madilyn was out like a light at 8:30 and tucked into her bed soon after. Caleb was being a lounge lizard laying on the couch. Well I finally found a way to get him to go to bed early. Every parent reading this will want to read on....

I turned off the television, and turned on the Bose music system. I turned it to my setting that has only love ballads. The artist include the Platters, Chicago, Boston and other groups from the 60- present. It took only one song and then the start of the second song for him to tell us goodnight. I asked why he was going to bed and he said he did not want to listen to "The Platters" sing Only you.

So next time I need time with David the Bose will be coming on. Hopefully it works again.

M. Ed.

Those 3 letters and 2 periods are now what come after my name in my official work correspondence. I did a ton of work to earn the right to add those 3 little letters and those 2 periods to the end of my name.

The past 2 years of my life have been CRAZY. Two years ago when I started the Masters program at KSU life was slow and easy. The first year went pretty smooth. However, around March of last year I decided I could no longer stay at my current work place. Along with going to school I set out to find a new job closer to home. I was blessed with the wonderful job as a Career Pathways Facilitator with the Cherokee County School System. My thought was that I had a year of grad school under my belt and I could handle a new job with very few issues.

I was suppose to attend summer school but was unable to do so due to having to be in training for my new job. Well it was not a problem because I could take the missed classes during the fall and spring and still graduate on time. So the plan would be that I would go to class on Thursday's and Saturday's. David and Caleb were already used to me being gone on Thursdays, and it would not be too hard for them to adjust to me being gone on Saturday's.

But then we got the call about Madilyn. I spent July with her and then it hit me in August. I have a new baby, a new job and have to go to graduate school 2 days a week. I did not think that I could handle all of these life changes at one time.

Thankfully I did not have to do it by myself. David made sure that he was always home on the days that I had to go to class. My KSU schedule made for long days for both of us. When I needed to study or work on a project David was always there to entertain Madilyn so that I could finish what needed to be finished. Without his love, support and understanding I would not have been able to complete my graduate school work on time, and I would not be able to add those 3 little letters and 2 periods after my name.

Donna J. Lloyd- M.Ed.

I am her MOTHER!

Several times last week people asked me if I was going to send Madilyn's bmom a Mother's Day card. My thought was what??? I am her mother. Just because you get pregnant, and have a baby does NOT make you a mother. If anything it makes you a breeder. A mother is the person who loves the child and cares for the child and nurtures the child. A mother puts her child first and does not knowingly put the child in harms way. A mother would do anything for her child.

Yes, she carried Madilyn for 9 months. But during that time she abused her. She abused her by smoking 2 packs of cigarettes a day, with no concern to how it would affect her in the long term. During that time stayed with a man who hit her and kicked her in the stomach. During that time she did not seek proper medical care for herself or Madilyn. These are the things we know that she did, there is no telling what other abuses were not reported to the adoption agency. Yes, she carried her but she did not nurture and care for her. She was not acting like a mother during this time. She was selfish and cared for no one except for herself. She does not deserve to be called "Mother."

So NO I did not send her a Mother's Day card. Nor will I ever send her one in the future. I also did not and will not acknowledge Birth Mother's Day. Why should she be honored when she has don nothing to deserve honor?

I also think it is so tacky that Birth Mother's Day is the day before Mother's Day.

Great Week

Last week was a wonderful but busy week. First we had David's b-day, then our 18th wedding anniversary and ended the week with Mother's Day.

For David's b-day we stayed in and invited a co-worker of his for dinner along with his wife Laura and thier son Bo. We had a great time with them. It is too bad that they live in MN and were only in town for the week.

We both took off work on our anniversary. This has been our tradition since our first year of marriage. The day was busy, because for the 1st year ever we had to focus on things other than us on this special day. Madilyn had a doctors appointment and I had to get my tire and rim replaced on my van. So the morning was shot. We ended up having a late breakfast/early lunch and then just going home and vegging out watching a movie. Thankfully we have found a reliable sitter for Madilyn so we were able to leave the kids at home and go to dinner. At dinner we reflected on our early years together and how much we have grown as a couple and a family.

We had a nice Mother's Day. We never go out to eat on this day. The resturants are entirely too crowded. So David grilled up some nice steaks and I baked some potatoes. I would rather spend time in my home than in a loud resturant. It was our first Mother's Day with Madilyn. Last year we had given up hope of having another child and then she came along. I have more to say about this but will save it for another post.

13 Possible Reasons

I called the school that did not admit Caleb and they sent me the following list of 13 possible reasons for him not being accepted.

1. It is our perception that the student does not want to attend- Caleb very much wants to attend this school and said so in the interview.

2. The work schedule of the parent seems to indicate that necessary supervision will not be available when the student is at home- David works at home. We discussed in the interview that Caleb and David would share an office/classroom space and work together during the day and that help would be available to Caleb all day.

3. Academic evaluation indicates that the student is working below grade level.- Caleb is working above grade level and scores above grade level on all state test.

4. It is our understanding that the student has educational needs that the school can not meet.- Caleb has no "special" educational needs, he is a normal student.

5. Apparent student behavior would tend to suggest that the student would have a difficult time in classes where continual attention toward school work is demanded.- I have no clue what this means since he is an A student sitting in a class room everyday of the week, and he is currently expected to pay continual attention.

6. Apparent conflict and/or lack of respect between the parent and student tend to suggest that a challenging parent-led education program is not the best alternative. - Caleb is not the CEO of our home, and we do not have a problem with a lack of respect on either part.

7. The applicant family has no regular church membership or involvement.- We attend church, host a home team, all of us volunteer and we pay our tithes and have a history of doing so for many years.

8. Information suggest that one or both parents are not in agreement with the philosophy and goals of the school.- This was a form that we had to read and sign that we agreed with. We both read the form and signed the form.

9. Indications on your application suggest that one or both parents are not in agreement with the statement of faith.- This was part of the form mentioned in #8

10. The student has been expelled from another school.- Caleb has never been expelled.

11. The student has a juvenile record- Caleb has no juvenile record

12. The student has a history of alcohol, tobacco or drug use. - Caleb does not drink, smoke or use drugs.

13. The student has a history of disruptive classroom behavior, and is disrespectful to authority.- Caleb is in 7th grade and during all of this time he has only been sent to the office twice. Once in Kindergarten and once in 4th grade. I do not see this a pattern of disruptive classroom behavior.

David and I feel the rejection of our application is bogus. We are are now moving on, but angry that Christians will not come forward and tell us the reason as to why our family was not accepted to be part of this educational program.

Disappointment 2

Spoke with the school that denied Caleb's application. They said that "Our family and religious values do not align with the mission of the school." All I can say is WHAT??? That really hurts that our christian values and family values are being questioned.

It makes my heart hurt, that Christians can not be accepting of others. During our interview when we mentioned the church we went to a few eyebrows raised. As we left the meeting I told David if Caleb did not get in it would be because of the church we attend. It was a joke. We have found out that the school did not call the church to verify our involvement and they did not call one of our references that works at the church. We have no proof that Caleb was denied admission based on our church preference, but we have heard through the grapevine that others who do not attend "traditional" churches have also been denied admittance to the school.